Creative Indulgence [2430-1-3 Sat 1:00 pm]

[Persephone Ruspoli]

She made her way back to Titus apartment, feeling sort of odd. There had been a time when she made the trip here three or four times a week, or times when she slept here and only returned to her apartment. But that had been quite some time ago, before she had decided that living with Titus was dangerous. The sort of dangerous that ended up with you dead.

At the moment, Titus was out doing his particular brand of dangerous, fulfilling some contract for some client. And so, Persephone was coming over to spend some time with Skye and create some art. She'd brought a few canvases with her in a plain bag, and paints and other necessary items in a clutch. Hopefully they'd have some fun this afternoon, and if all went well, maybe they'd be able to talk.

Titus had mentioned Skye was having more panic attacks, and that she'd had one in public. That wasn't good news. Hopefully Persephone would be able to gently coax the truth from Skye, and they'd find some resolution, even if that resolution was therapy or medication. She hoped not, but... Skye had been through a lot.

Persphone pressed her thumb to the scanner, opening the door with her hip as she came in, "Skye?" She called out, "I brought paints!"

[Skye Thompson]

Skye sighed, studying her drawing and reflecting that perhaps sketching the scene outside her bedroom window had not been the best idea after all. It was one thing to draw stills of objects and faces, something she was quite good at, but capturing life in motion was another matter entirely. Skye started at a sudden sound from downstairs, but relaxed, a smile coming easily to her face, when she recognized the voice as Persephone’s.

Putting down her partially finished drawing, Skye slid off the bed and went out into the hall. “Persephone?” She called, feeling a pleasant cheerful sensation as she greeted her friend. She danced down the stairs and met Persephone at the door, holding it open so she could come inside more easily. “It’s so good to see you!”

[Persephone Ruspoli]

"It's good to see you too!" She stepped inside, slipping out of her shoes and setting her things down before giving Skye a hug. "I hope Titus hasn't been keeping you too busy!" From what she'd heard, he was keeping their outings minimal and to low-pressure places to keep the panic attacks from happening. Of course, that didn't mean they didn't happen, but the attempt was still kind.

"I brought a few canvases and paints so we could try something new." She gestured to the white slates on the floor, waiting to be filled. "But I'm warning you in advance, I'm a terrible painter. I don't do well with two-dimensional space." Her attempts always came across as flat and drab, so she didn't bother painting that often, except for fun once in a while.

[Skye Thompson]

“No, not at all really. We’ve been here mostly.” Skye almost wished they would go out more, do something, anything, to take her mind off certain things she really didn’t want to think about. Yet at the same time, she felt safer in Titus’ apartment than anywhere else. Outside it felt as if her father was waiting around every corner, behind every doorway, following her always just out of sight. No, no… Skye quickly redirected her thoughts, returning Persephone’s hug and letting the warm sensation of trust and familiarity spread through her. She couldn’t think about him, wouldn’t think about him, while Persephone was here.

“Thanks for coming!” Skye murmured as she and Persephone drew away from each other, and Persephone began to explained things. “It’s nice to not be alone here.” Skye hated being alone, even for a short space of time. She didn’t want to be alone with herself, with her thoughts, with her dreams. Especially not at night, when her father’s image lurked in every shadow… No! Think about something else! “I’ve never done painting before. I used to draw. I…” She felt suddenly shy, yet overwhelmingly exited, “I made a few since I got here… Would you… do- do you- would you like to... to see?”

[Persephone Ruspoli]

Persephone nodded, listening carefully. Skye sounded good, though lonely. That was inevitable with Titus. He was always off living his own life. She would have to mention that to him, see if he could take fewer jobs for a few months, just until Skye was settled. Leaving her alone for long stretches of time couldn't be healthy.

Skye was drawing? That was good, really really good. If she was creating, that could be an outlet for whatever dark thoughts were plaguing her. Though she hadn't mentioned it to Titus, Persephone suspected Skye's father was lingering on her mind. Maybe talking about what had happened to her had let some of the worse of her memories come to the surface. Time would heal those wounds, time and some way to express her emotions.

"I'd love to!" She told Skye, not bothering to hide the excitement in her voice, "I always love looking at someone else's work!"

[Skye Thompson]

As soon as she had the word go from Persephone, Skye went racing back upstairs to get her drawings. She felt rather proud of her artistic abilities, and hoped Persephone would like what she’d drawn. But what if she wasn’t good enough? She’d only ever shown her drawings to Adrian, and he would have said they were good no matter what. Adrian was honest about the big things, like why their mother had left, but he liked to sugar-coat the smaller issues, and sometimes Skye had been unsure whether he was telling her the truth or not.

Reaching her room, she quickly found the few small sheets of plastic and returned downstairs with them. She hesitated a moment, then grabbed her unfinished sketch off her bed and brought it too. Back downstairs, she laid them down side by side, then stepped back so that Persephone could look as she pleased. There were four drawings in all. The first two were portraits of Titus and Persephone, the third was a simple drawing off her room from the perspective of a person sitting under the window, and the last was the one she’d been working on when Persephone arrived. Skye watched Persephone’s face anxiously, waiting to see some reaction there.

[Persephone Ruspoli]

Persephone waited for Skye to return with the drawings. She'd already made up her mind to praise whatever Skye gave her, and possibly find some polite kind criticism about the pieces so Skye didn't think she was lying. It wasn't like she was planning on lying, so much as just... not hurting Skye's feelings. Hopefully there was real talent in Skye's drawings, but even if there wasn't, Persephone was going to encourage her anyway.

But when Skye spread them out on the table, Persephone couldn't stops smiling. Skye did have real talent. She wouldn't need any false encouragement. "Skye, this is fantastic! I love them!" She told Skye, saying nothing but the truth, "Did you do the portraits from memory? I love the perspective in this one-" She tapped her finger on the simple drawing, and turned to the unfinished one, "And I can see this one was giving you trouble. Moving objects can be such a pain."

[Skye Thompson]

“Yeah, those are from memory.” Skye’s voice was full of pride, an emotion she usually suppressed. But today she couldn’t help it. She was ecstatic, on top of the world. Persephone liked her artwork. A real artist, someone she knew and trusted to tell her the truth, said her drawings were good. “This one though,” she looked at her unfinished sketch with Persephone. “It’s so much harder to draw things here. There’s so much more going on and, and the light keeps changing.” Skye grinned, loving the way that sentence sounded. Because there was only one place on Terra where the light changed, and that was the Top, where you could see the sun. That was where she was now.

There was something at present however, that Skye was even more proud of than her drawings, and she picked up the sketch of her room, showing it excitedly to Persephone. “Look what I did!” She pointed to the bottom right hand corner of the picture. There, in a barely intelligible scrawl that better befitted a three-year old, were four capital letters. S-K-Y-E. And though the letters were so messy, Skye’s face shone with pride as she looked down at the name she had signed onto her drawing. It was truly hers now.

[Persephone Ruspoli]

"I wish I had your memory. Anytime I do faces, I have to rely on photographs to get them right." That was one of the reasons her artwork was usually abstract. She hated having to rely on photos when sculpting people. It was much easier when the things you were making didn't exist in any dimension, so it didn't matter if the eyes were a little too wide, or the nose wasn't quite right.

"You might have to work from a still image if you want to keep the light consistent, but I think it's coming along nicely." She said, then glanced away from the cityscape to the drawing of Skye's room. Skye's name. And Skye was just so happy that Persephone couldn't stop the smile from taking over her face too. "Oh sweetie, your name!" She leaned in and gave Skye another hug, so happy to see how quickly she was progressing.

[Skye Thompson]

Skye returned Persephone’s hug, smiling happily. “I hadn’t thought of taking a picture. I’ve never really used a camera or anything.” At the moment however, Skye wasn’t thinking about cameras. She wasn’t really thinking about anything. She felt free, as if she were flying, or floating, suspended in warmth and happiness. Persephone liked her drawing, and her name. She had done something good, something to be proud of. And Skye was proud. For the first time in her life she was proud of what she had done.

The first time. No. She was falling. No. Not again. Not now. Not here. But she wasn’t here. She wasn’t in Titus’ apartment anymore. She was back in her kitchen in the Below, and her father had her clamped tight in his arms, squeezing the life from her. Skye screamed and pulled away from him, but he grabbed her hair from behind as she turned to run, and she fell to the ground. Shaking, Skye slowly turned her face toward him, and found herself staring at Persephone. She was still here, still safe, and her father was no where to be found.

[Persephone Ruspoli]

Persephone smiled. She'd have to see about getting a camera for Skye to use. Nothing fancy, just your basic point and click since too many options could overwhelm Skye and make her reluctant to try it out. But a basic camera could be fun for Skye to have, and maybe she'd like to preserve some of her new memories. It would be easy enough to pick one up and bring it with her next time she came.

She about to ask if Skye would be interested in trying photography when Skye's face darkened and turned terrified. Before she could react, Skye was screaming and pulling away from Persephone. She let go without even thinking, and Skye crumpled to the floor. Persephone watched as the darkness crept away, and the Skye she'd just been talking to came back.

Persephone carefully held out a hand to help Skye up, "It's okay." She told Skye, keeping her voice as level and soothing as she could manage. It was hard, since Persephone felt shaken up by what had happened. "You're okay."

[Skye Thompson]

“I’m sorry.” Skye murmured, not knowing what else to say, “I’m sorry Persephone.” She took her friend’s hand and pulled herself to her feet, still shaking. Tears began to well up in her eyes, but Skye wiped them furiously away. She wasn’t supposed to be crying. She was supposed to be having fun with Persephone. They were supposed to be happy. “I’m sorry.” She said yet again, struggling to keep her voice level. “I-I just thought I… I don’t know, why… I-I… I’m sorry.”

Skye looked at the floor, feeling ashamed and confused. A small droplet of water began to slide down her cheek, and she rubbed her eyes angrily again. She was not going to cry. She wasn’t going to let Persephone see how deeply frightened she was, that there was really truly something wrong with her, and she was possibly crazy. Titus seemed to understand, although Skye had no idea why he would, but though she trusted Persephone just as much, or maybe a little more than Titus, she didn’t want Persephone to know she was crazy. People who were crazy got sent away. And Skye wanted nothing more in the world than to stay right here.

[Persephone Ruspoli]

"Skye, listen to me." Persphone was carefully not to touch Skye, just in case she triggered another panic attack. "Don't you ever apologize to me. You didn't ask for this, and you didn't deserve it. You have nothing to feel sorry for, okay? I'm sorry for not thinking and triggering something."

There was some dark irony in this. Two living Veres, one was psychotic and the other was having a breakdown, and Persephone had gotten herself tangled up in their lives. Persephone should have known better. She should have ignored Titus' message, just like her friends had told her too. But she loved Titus, and worst of all, she was already certain she loved Skye a little for being so brave and surviving when the whole world had been against her.

"It's okay." Persephone said, carefully guiding Skye over to one of the couches, "Let's just sit down and take a deep breath."

[Skye Thompson]

Skye sat down, swallowing her tears and trying to stop shaking. She nodded to Persephone’s words, not knowing what else to do. “It’s not that you weren’t thinking.” She muttered, not knowing or caring if Persephone was listening. “I was thinking to much.” But that was just it. They were only thoughts, only thoughts that she was frightened of. No, they were more than that. They were memories, memories that fourteen years of unrelenting torture had worn into her mind.

“But it’s over.” Skye whispered, not realizing she was speaking out loud, “Why I am still scared?” Then again, maybe that was just why she was scarred. It was over for now, but there was still a part of her that refused to believe it was truly over. Some day, her father would once again have absolute control over her. And anything she did wrong right now would bring some day closer and closer. “Persephone.” Skye looked up anxiously into her friend’s face. “Please don’t tell Titus.” When Titus had seen her panic in public, he’d decided to take her out less, so she was less exposed to stress. What if he did the same with Persephone?

[Persephone Ruspoli]

"Skye..." Persephone sighed. Not telling Titus wouldn't solve anything. Skye would just keep having panic attacks. And Titus already knew she was having them. But... maybe it was best to let Skye think that she had control over this. Control had always done wonders for Titus' well being. "Alright. I won't say anything to Titus."

She sat beside Skye, trying to find the best way to broach the subject. "Sweetie, is there anything I can do to help you? I can't stop you from thinking, but I know people. We could find you someone to talk to, if you think talking to a professional could help. Or medication, if you thought you might want to try that."